How self-love is neglected in the communities that need it most
The stands are set up, flowers made of pipe cleaners ready, balloon flowers in a basket ready, chocolate and candy ready, and stickies all checked. It was cold outside Eaton center, as a girl wearing a black jacket walked closer to us as we stood in front of our stand and gave out handmade flowers. She had a large bouquet of fresh yellow flowers and got closer to the crowd. She asked what we were doing outside with the setup of all these balloons, flowers, and candies. We let her know we are spreading the message of self-love and care amongst the community. To our surprise, she felt so joyful to hear that instead of taking the flower we made, she reached into the bouquet and gave us a flower. Then, another, and another, and then the whole bouquet… and a hug.
The girl was from Pakistan and shared how her experiences with her community led her mental well-being and personal shifting emotions to be often undermined. There are many girls, women, boys, men, and people of all color and ages who often find their personal self to be disregarded as being secondary when compared to a title. As countless people came to our stand and shared a smile, a laugh, and a note, this only meant that there are many individuals who do value individual self-care.
What did we do and why?
As the pandemic has been tough for everyone, an overlooked phenomenon has been individuals in ethnic families spending more time indoors in a culture that often overlooks the importance of having love for oneself as a priority. A difficult situation made it worse, we sought to tackle the issue and share how important it is to take care of ourselves, even when we are overwhelmed by our surroundings, or busy with taking care of other things and other people.
So, after much planning and work, handmade all we could. We managed to set up a booth outside of Eaton Centre to give out pipe cleaner flowers, balloon flowers, and candies to people.
Initially, the project was issued on Valentine's day because we wanted to remind people that Valentine’s Day isn’t just a day to celebrate with your significant others, it is also a day to cherish the very existing relationship you have with yourself.
People are surprised by free
Something so eye-catching with four people managing, many people were reluctant to come unless we had approached them as they walked near.
Why? They thought they would have to pay a price. People commonly spoke about how simply giving care to the community in this manner could not have possibly been for free but it was. One by one they began accepting what we had laid out and wrote down a message on stickies. Some share that there does not have to be a price tag on the care you deserve. They also shared an understanding that self-appreciation does not always have to carry a heavy fine.
Proposed funding
As much as it was a surprise for many individuals that they can take whatever they like, however many they like, it was also a surprise for us to hear from them that a few of them would like to fund this if we were to do it again. As we conversed with them further, they shared that a simple act of kindness can affect anyone regardless of who they are. A few adults even asked if they could support our works and projects elsewhere, solely to spread and support the well-being of other individuals. Simply, to also promote self-love.
Embedded emotions
There were many individuals who shared personal situations and emotions too, all of which were expressed sincerely. A few young adults shared how they do not take time often to care much for themselves as their parents do not pass that message explicitly onto them and further detaches their connection with them. On the other hand, a few older adults, and a few elderly, expressed personal life events where they wished they would have cared more for themselves and others.
Sincere anonymity
As we packed up and headed home, we looked over the notes that people had stickied onto the board, which included things people found to be a source of their happiness in dark times. Others wrote on gratitude, a few wrote on appreciation for this, whilst one wrote this:
“Thank you so much for this, I really needed this. I was really about to kill myself a few days ago. This helped.”
This note caught our attention, but there was no name on the note. We feel vulnerable that we could not get a hold of this person and help more, but it was at that moment we decided no matter how hard it is going to be, we want to keep this project going in the future.
We want to let you guys know no matter what is happening at this moment, or what has happened in the past, life goes on and there will always be love around you and you are never alone.
This project happened because of you.
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